Today, on a very special episode of S.T.W.K...

...Kaseem Bentley loses his virginity. Age: 14.

"When you’re having sex as a teen you don’t know what you’re doing. You’re just glad you’re there in that car and someone’s touching your dick. Even the retards got their dicks sucked. I was a salutatorian, but the retard was getting pussy.

"I was fourteen years old. I had my first quasi girlfriend – two weeks. That’s like six months to a young black man. And she was cute but she had that Oprah 84 weight. If you cut her booty in half you could make a kids’ vest.

"And she brought me into her house and her grandma was sitting there in a rocking chair that wasn’t moving so I thought she was dead. So she brought me upstairs and we were going at it. And I just thought I was gonna come in my pants. But she locked the door and didn’t ask for any condoms so I guess that’s her version of safe sex.

"And I lasted a half an hour, just goin’. I was going like I was going back to my cell afterward. After that I knew that that was one of my many talents. Because look at me – I’m in horrible shape, I have a horrible outlook on life. God has blessed me with being funny and being able to please a woman.

"Women need to understand – they look for these hot men at the club. That’s not good sex! That’s controlled rape! You’re not gonna have ‘making love’ with these huge juiced up guys. That’d be like fucking a race horse. Why do these women fuck these athletes?"

As with many of his stories, the moral of Kaseem's V-Card story is that he's great in bed. And as you've noticed by now, Kaseem has a LOT of questions about women's tastes.

Kaseem has been asking me to weigh in more in these posts, so I'll tell you that my V-Card story ends the same way - with me being GREAT in bed. I mean, I'm assuming I was great, because he came, like, right away. That means I'm great, right?